Why Am I Doing This?

April 2, 2009 ·

So when I was offered a blog spot I was excited but at the same time I was scared. I love to write and I’m pompous enough to believe that others give a shit about what I have to say. There’s a lot on my mind especially with everything going on this past year.

As of this month, April , I will have been transitioning for a year. It’s been a um… very interesting year. One full of heartaches and good surprises. Every once in a while I’ve asked myself. “why am I doing this?” I’m someone that has had so much tragedy and abuse in my life growing up, that as an adult I try to avoid conflict and stress. Just had enough of it for a lifetime. Yet here I am, inviting in a life that will have ostracized from family and friends. A life that almost guarantees me a hard time getting jobs. A life that kind of leaves me a second class citizen.

The answers though are always the same. This is the only life I can live. I can’t any longer stand being uncomfortable looking at myself in the mirror. Being a fraud to my friends and love ones. I was tired of seeing other women just living their lives and being filled with such jealousy, anger and depression. More importantly, I’m doing this because I have a reason to be happy.

But why write a blog? I have no idea. Maybe to express myself about my life and what I see going around me. I see a lot injustice and the more voices out there crying fowl and letting others know of this the closer we are at have equality for all. Does this make any sense? Who knows.